Are your business and family battling for your time and energy?
Mine are. And it’s not because of some mistake I’ve made or something I’m doing wrong. That’s just the reality. My business could use me full time. My family wants me full time. My church and community would love to have me full time. And my soul and sanity request a little time in there as well.
Being a mom to 5 boys and a successful woman in business is a balancing act! I’ve spent my career really preaching the idea of business and family being able to grow together in harmony. I’ve helped a lot of business owners create stronger relationships at home, while growing their business. I love it! It’s very rewarding work. And I’m feeling the need to get really, painfully transparent. Maybe these revelations surprise you. Maybe they are helpful. And maybe not. But I feel like someone needs to hear the full truth!
- My kids sometimes feel neglected because I’m working my business.
- I do my best to pay attention to the needs of everyone in my family, but sometimes I miss stuff, and discover after the fact that one of my kids has been struggling.
- When the stress level with the company gets high, I put my husband on the back burner. I don’t want to. I don’t do it on purpose. But it happens.
- I absolutely hold back in business because of the needs and demands of my family.
- Not all of my kids love my business. Two of them would LOVE for me to be a stay at home mom.
- I haven’t been on a field trip in years. I’ve never been a member of the PTA, and I don’t attend every school meeting for the parents. I volunteer at the school 1-2 times a year.
Are you shocked? Appalled? Judging me?
How can I preach balance between business and family when I have this battle going on in my own home?
It’s simple really. You don’t have to be perfect to be really good. And in spite of my weaknesses, I am really good at winning in business and at home. My husband and I love each other and are awesome partners in life. Our business, although not as big as it could be, is strong and provides a great living for my family. Each of my kids knows that I love them dearly, and they know that I am committed to them.
You have to change your perspective if you are ever going to feel like you are winning the battle between family and business.
In fact, we have to stop viewing it as a battle at all. Every problem that exists in my imperfect family, could just as easily exist if I were not running a company. Every beautiful moment that exists inside my family could just as easily happen if I were not running a company.
The truth is, raising a family takes work, dedication, and unwavering commitment whether you do business or not.
The reason I can preach growing a business while balancing family is because I’ve learned to let go of the idea of perfection on either side. My husband and I have made a major commitment to put faith and family first. And business fits in around the edges. Sometimes we get out of balance. Sometimes we make conscious and unconscious choices to put the breaks on business growth to make time to sit on the sidelines of some football, soccer, or track field.
We get a lot of things wrong. But the one thing we always get right is that commitment to family.
So the next time your kids are crying when you leave for the airport, or you can’t seem to focus on date night because your mind is on the deadline waiting in the office, take a deep breath. You are normal. And it will be fine. Hug your family more. Plan a day to spend with them. Say no to an opportunity so you can attend a concert. And just keep doing the best you can! But please, stop looking at it as a battle, because you just might end up the casualty.